Feeling powerful and in control of emotions is something many people want to achieve but don’t know how to. When they don’t know how to manage their emotions, many people end up resorting to unhelpful coping mechanisms, which only feeds their feelings of powerlessness.
If this sounds like you, here’s a simple way you can immediately gain power over your emotions….and it all comes down to a question of belief!
A HUGE belief that many people hold is the idea that external things ‘make’ us feel a certain way. It’s understandable why we hold this belief: it can feel like people make us angry, sad, happy, annoyed. It can feel like anxiety, stress and burnout happen ‘to’ us, or that we’re irrecoverably damaged from a divorce, or our childhoods – that the reason we’re feeling down in the dumps now is because of the thing that bully said 30 years ago.
A vital thing to realise is no one can literally MAKE us feel a certain way! They’re not getting inside us and causing our emotional reaction. It’s essential you realise that any and all of anything you have ever felt and will ever feel is coming from inside of you – YOU are creating your emotional reactions to life!
• This is why some people get stressed and anxious very easily, and some don’t
• This is why some people are FURIOUS if someone bumps their car, while others are just a bit annoyed
• This is why some people brood for days/months/years about something someone said to them while others seem to bounce back unscathed
The key thing to recognise is you have a CHOICE over how you react. Recognise you are creating that emotional reaction based on the filters* through which you view life, and therefore you do have power over how you react.
Say someone bumps your car or steals your bike, or you loose your purse.
You can choose to accept it and move on, or you can choose to brood for days on end about that [insert expletive of choice!] and make yourself feel rubbish.
And that’s what it’s all about…this is about moving your mindset away from giving external things power
Changing the belief that external things make us feel a certain way is massively empowering.
So over the next week, notice your emotional reactions: ‘Am I being external here?’ ‘is it justified for me to feel this way?’ ‘I have a choice over how I react to this,’ and challenge yourself anytime you say things like ‘that’s so annoying,’ ‘you made me feel bad,’ ‘this is really irritating.’
Build up the belief that YOU are the one in charge of your emotional reactions. It’s like a breath of fresh air when you do.
What I have shared above is one of the topics that is often addressed with my clients in my 10 session 1 to 1 programme, which takes you from Surviving to Thriving . The programme is split over 3 stages of A. Release of symptoms and better Understanding of your Health , to B. getting Back on Track working on clearing further issues, social anxiety, self worth and more and finally C. Seeing the Future
If you are interested in knowing more about this programme please contact me for a chat to see what is needed and whether we are a good fit.